Thoughts on God & Nailpolish

God's been speaking to me a lot lately.  This might sound weird, but He's been speaking to me about nailpolish.  I very, very rarely paint my fingernails.  For some reason I've been painting them a lot lately.  My current favorite color is called Sonic Bloom.  But that's besides the point.

This past week was a gorgeous Wisconsin week.  For the first time in moooonths it was sunny and warm for five days in a row.  While 50-55 degrees may not sound warm to some, after months of not even coming close to 30, the 50's are pure magic!

Next to my backdoor is a small patch of dirt that I plant herbs in.  The green onions and chives are already in full growth and all last week I kept wanting to get my hands in the dirt, pull the weeds, feel the earth.  I love that sort of thing.  Yet because my nails were painted, I found myself not doing what I wanted to do, what will need to be done.  I didn't want to mess up my nails.  (This sounds so vain, doesn't it?? hahaha)

So every day I would walk past this small patch of dirt and want to get my hands dirty, yet I made it the entire week without doing so.

God began talking to me about this, and how I can be like this with things in the spiritual as well.  I can put things on myself that make me feel good, look good, that help me play the role of who I think I'm supposed to be in a situation.  And I can feel nervous or afraid when situations arise that threaten those things.

But God didn't make me to be those things.  They are things I've put on myself.

He spoke so clearly to me about how all I need to do is obey Him and keep my hand to the task at hand.  And I don't need to be afraid of things that I've built crumbling around me.  Because the only things that are going to be chipped away and stripped off are the things that I've put on myself, not who He's said I am.  The things He's done in me and put in me will stand.

It's funny how easy it is to sing songs that say all I want is Him and it's so easy to say He's everything.  Yet when He challenges something I cling to that I think has value or importance, I can be so hard to convince that He's right.  It's always hard to give up things we love, or to see things in us we've spent years building come crashing down.  Yet ultimately He is all I want and all I need. 

He is everything.

So even though it might hurt as things are being chipped away at, I know that I'm only being made to look more and more like Him. 

And that is truly worth living for.